figures that seem so close
are actually fading away.

i need to wash my face before tomorrow morning
and find someone who doesn't find me boring.

I AM NOT PART BIRD.

(continue later)

not the end of me.

my face is freezing and you dont care
hands are fucked over and it's all just the air.

the world keeps spinning,
in a single room, single studio
single
cats and myself and
the world keeps spinning...

the world keeps spinning
as you remember those you've fucked
those who've sucked
you off

ive mentally removed portions of my life
then i find myself regretting it every other night.
you haven't, you won't. you're you. and untrue.

and in my head, i tell myself over and over
that the world will continue to spin
and i tell myself ive forgotten
and im sorry and i've given in.

we are all just friends who were friends of friends who you've fucked
once or twice.

i'm too nice.

the world is just spinning
and it's not the end of the world.

"Line up and call me names,
Come spit in my face.
It doesn't matter,
I'm in a better place
Slander
Drag my name through the dirt,
Bring me disgrace.
It doesn't matter,
I'm in a better place."

need things that dont remind me of anything.
tired and warm.
confident and ready
willing, but unsure.
too much love to give away;
only to a brick wall.

love

without the fish
i wish
to lay flat upon the ocean
emotionless

look up at nothing
in the middle of nothing
upon the pacific sea.

ill lose buoyancy
and travel to the bottom
of everything.